This article was originally published on Linkedin.
Workplace culture is the values, practices, and behaviors guiding a company. When we start a new job, we are told about workplace culture, which is part of the onboarding training. We are told that the company’s people are innovative, respectful, creative, and fun. We get excited because we see happy employees in the hallways and beautiful posters showcasing the company’s values with eye-catching designs.
As the days go by, we start to see how those values are really lived. Eventually, we encounter some kind of conflict: a colleague has spread a rumor, we’re given an overwhelming amount of urgent work, someone hasn’t replied to an email for over a week, etc. It’s normal—nothing out of the ordinary. You talk to your manager about it, and they tell you it’s no big deal and that you should work on your “emotional intelligence.” You accept it and keep thinking about it.
Time passes, and you don’t feel like your work is innovative. People aren’t that respectful (the rumors persist). You’re constantly working under pressure, and you’re not having fun. The posters on the walls start to look different, grayer…
I’m sure this story sounds familiar to you. If not, I envy you.
Workplace culture is also about the actions not taken
In many companies, workplace culture is often boasted about. We get manuals and stickers; it’s on our mugs, notebooks, and pens. However, when something happens that goes against that workplace culture, it’s usually ignored, minimized, or forgotten. Managers tend to forget that workplace culture isn’t just something to brag about—it’s something to live by. Everyone needs to embody it, not just the “subordinates.”
A few years ago, I was in a Management 3.0 course, and a phrase hit me like a ton of bricks:
“The culture of any organization is shaped by the worst behavior the leader is willing to tolerate.”
— Gruenter and Whitaker, School Culture Rewired
This made me recall the times I saw managers tolerate behaviors like gossip, project theft, harassment, and bullying. The excuse was always that one “must work on their emotional intelligence.” In other words, you shouldn’t let it bother you if you know what someone is saying isn’t true, that what should matter is what you’ve achieved, not who gets the credit, or that “that’s just how X is, just ignore them.”
These situations always made me feel bad, out of place, like I was overreacting. The workplace culture was supposed to be about serving, supporting, and trusting… but how can you trust a leader who rewards someone for stealing your projects? How can you feel comfortable when these leaders support those who hurt, belittle, or harass you?
The impact of going against workplace culture is underestimated. People who want to follow it and speak up about these inconsistencies are often ridiculed, blamed, and sometimes re-victimized. Workplace culture is built by people but primarily by leaders. If leaders fail to live by those values, they lose the trust of their employees. If an employee comes to you, and you choose to ignore them, it will shape your image as a leader.
The True Culture
A leader should never overlook—let alone reward—behaviors that go against the company’s culture, especially when they harm others, infringe on their rights, or compromise their dignity. I experienced this firsthand at a company I was once so proud to be part of, but something awful happened to me. Someone shared a picture of me sleeping during my meal break, and I was going through psychiatric treatment at the time, trying to find the right dose of medication. People at work knew about it. After the photo was shared, some coworkers started acting strangely around me. I reported the incident, but instead of support, I was told that I should “understand that not everyone gets that mental health stuff.”
Not only did they request that I disclose my diagnosis to everyone, but I was re-victimized repeatedly. When I went to HR, they spoke to me with such sweet, gentle words, but nothing was ever resolved. I was still blamed for that “incident.” They began giving me unclear information and avoided giving any real answers.
Eventually, I decided to go to their boss. When I explained what had happened to me, his face went pale. He admitted I was right and promised to fix everything. After that, HR started acting strangely toward me until the day I left the company.
If leaders tolerate these behaviors, they will eventually find themselves surrounded by people willing to step on others, destroy work relationships, and drive away talent that could have contributed something meaningful to the company.
Is it okay to give second chances? Yes, but never reward recurring behavior. And ultimately, no matter how talented you think someone is, there are “mistakes” that should never be tolerated, especially if they go against the values on the poster behind you in your spacious executive office.
Have you had any similar experiences? I’d love to hear about them.
You can also read about The Seven Types of Rest.
